Have you ever had one of those days where everything seems to go wrong? Your alarm clock doesn’t go off, you spill coffee on your shirt, and you get stuck in traffic on the way to work. You arrive at your desk feeling defeated, wondering why you even bother. Well, my friend, you may be suffering from learned helplessness.
Learned helplessness is a psychological concept that was first discovered in the 1960’s by psychologist Martin Seligman observed that dogs who had been subjected to inescapable shocks eventually stopped trying to escape, even when given the opportunity. They had learned to be helpless.
But it’s not just dogs who suffer from this affliction. Humans are also susceptible to learned helplessness, and it can manifest in a variety of ways. You may find yourself giving up on tasks before even attempting them, assuming that you’ll fail anyway. Or you may find that you constantly seek out help and reassurance from others, even when you’re fully capable of solving problems on your own.
So, how do you know if you’re a victim of learned helplessness? Here are a few tell-tale signs:
- You’re easily overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks. Making a grocery list or doing laundry feels like an insurmountable challenge.
- You’re constantly seeking reassurance from others. You ask for their opinion on even the most trivial matters.
- You’re quick to give up on tasks if you encounter any kind of resistance or difficulty.
- You’re convinced that your failures are due to your own inherent lack of ability, rather than external factors.
If any of this sounds familiar, don’t worry – you’re not alone. But it’s important to recognize the impact that learned helplessness can have on your life. Not only can it hold you back in your personal and professional pursuits, but it can also lead to feelings of depression and anxiety.
So, what can you do to overcome learned helplessness? Here are a few tips:
- Practice positive self-talk. Instead of telling yourself that you’re incapable of completing a task, focus on your strengths and past successes.
- Break tasks down into smaller, more manageable steps. This can help to make even the most daunting task feel more achievable.
- Celebrate small victories. Even if you don’t complete a task perfectly, focus on the progress you’ve made and give yourself credit for it.
- Surround yourself with supportive, positive people. Having a strong support system can help boost your confidence and motivate you to keep trying.
- Challenge negative beliefs. If you find yourself thinking things like “I’m just not good at this”, challenge those beliefs by asking yourself if they’re true.
Now, I know what you’re thinking – this all sounds like a lot of work Hayley. And you’re right – overcoming learned helplessness takes time and effort. But trust me, it’s worth it. Imagine a life where you feel empowered to take on challenges and pursue your goals, rather than feeling defeated before you even start. That’s the kind of life you deserve.
And if all else fails, remember this: at least you’re not a dog who’s been subjected to inescapable shocks. So, chin up, my friend – you’ve got this.
As always, be kind to yourself and be kind to others.
Until next month.
